Yeah, I said it... humor in puke. Hey, if we can't find the humor, we'll just go crazy. So I'm sitting up late, having made my husband some yummy Valentine's cookies (I know, I said we don't celebrate Valentine's Day... and we really don't... but he loves these cookies and I thought I'd surprise him.) I was watching a show and knitting and thinking of going to bed when I hear the kids' bedroom door fly open and a very distraught Ethan yell, "MOM, I PUKED!" Oh boy... many thoughts ran through my head, like how this is likely just the very beginning of a long, nasty bout in our home... or how I have a VERY busy week ahead of me and this is really inconvenient... or how the kids have Valentine's parties in their classes tomorrow and they've SO been looking forward to this and how at least one kid will now miss the big event (yes, I'm a good mom and I'll still take the candy to class that he signed up to bring, along with his personally-hand-written Valentine's cards to everyone)... or how I just don't want this and I was so hoping that we'd somehow been deemed special enough to not be "blessed" with it. Yeah... all of that went through my head in a nanosecond. So I calmly put my knitting down and said, "It's okay. At least it was only on the floor and not your bed." Uh, yeah right... in your dreams, Christina. "Oh it's on my bed too mom!" Ahhhh... let the humor begin!!!
Sure enough... all over the bed, the goose-down comforter, the carpet AND the area rug. Nice! He got in the shower and brushed his teeth well in the shower and got all freshened up. I went to gather my cleaning supplies and when I got back to the bedroom, most of said vomit had somehow disappeared. There was my precious dog, looking up at me like he'd just had the best meal of his life and licking his chops. Seriously, THAT made ME want to vomit. But what the heck, he made my clean-up a whole lot easier... nothing chunky to clean now! Yay! (Please, oh PUH-LEASE don't let the dog get sick now!!!!!!)
I got the floor all cleaned up and then sprayed a vinegar solution all over the place and covered it with a ton of baking soda. ***Side note here: Nothing takes out the smell of puke like vinegar and baking soda. Trust me when I tell you that I have experience with this. Anytime they puke, I clean it up well and then wet the area (yes, even mattresses) with vinegar and water and then cover the wet areas with baking soda. Don't be stingy with it either. POUR IT ON! I buy the 12lb bags at Costco. They are dirt cheap and baking soda cleans like nobody's business. Plus, it's not a chemical, so I'm not afraid of my kids breathing in anything nasty. When it's all dry tomorrow, I'll vacuum it up and I swear to you it will not smell like puke anymore!!***
Meanwhile, while Cinderella is hard at work on the bedroom floor, Ethan is in the living room and I hear that nasty gag and yell at him to RUN!! That didn't work out the way I had envisioned, so now it's all down the hallway and the bathroom floor, bathroom cabinet, and bathroom sink. WAY TO GO ETHAN!!! When I had thrown the bed sheets and comforter in the washing machine on a sanitize cycle, I thought I had really done well keeping it to one load of laundry! That'll teach me now won't it?
So anyway... here we are... Ethan moved rooms. I had to give up my bedroom fan because my kid won't sleep without one (it's gonna be a L-O-N-G night I tell you!) and Evan was moved to the bottom bunk. I don't want anyone on the top bunk when the flu is going around. I don't even want to *THINK* about where the puke would go from THAT angle!! Everyone is clean and fresh and back to sleep and they have big bowls sitting next to their beds with strict instructions to aim into them should they feel the urge to hurl. Here I am, wired and just waiting for the next round to start.
Did I mention that my kids *always* do this the night before I'm supposed to work a 12-hour shift? Yeah. These are the joyous moments of motherhood that I'll cherish always! Stay tuned for the next installment in the Harris Puke Adventures. :)
WA Children's Choice Picture Book Awards
4 months ago